Tuesday 1 July 2008

A different Life

I went to South Africa a few weeks ago for a month, to get some therapy for my daughter who has Aspergers.We stayed in cape town, I have travelled quite a bit and still continue to do so but cape town is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen.We rented a flat on the beach front. I would wake up with questions and apprehensions about my daughters care but once I caught a view of the beach or the mountains that surrounded us I felt such a sense of calmness and well being.I would take her for walks on the beach every day after therapy and every day the sea would present us with a different gift it could be a preserved sea horse amazingly coloured. Shells,bits of coral and so many different kinds of seaweed that my daughter suggested we take them home and cook them this is one kid that loves her vegetables.
Never have I felt so comfortable in a country I have never wanted to visit, always put off by the history of apartheid. My first trip out by myself to the mall I noticed that I blended in with the crowd completely as eighty percent of the people looked like me now you might think what is she talking about ? But this was an amazingly rare experience because as a mixed race person you tend to stand out a little.This was a kind of nirvana for me because when people looked at me they saw themselves and looked at me accordingly with a knowing acceptance,well what they thought they knew if you catch my drift.I went to the salon for a hair cut and one of the ladys asked me how long I had been away as she assumed I was a South African coloured with an english accent.I know SA has been getting a lot of bad press recently and some of it deservedly so but I have never met a friendlier more relaxed bunch of people blacks,whites and coloreds alike. The cost of living seemed to be lower than living in Lagos,the quality of life is amazing all this just five and a half hours away from Nigeria.

When I got back I wanted to relocate and had a bit of a cry as nepa took light once again and the local security teams started banging their iron bars as they do every night just as you are getting into a nice sleep presumably to scare off armed robbers.I had been used to the sound of the ocean putting me to sleep and I thought how much more comfortable my children would be in the Cape totally be able to blend in and have a healthy out door life on the beach,surfing,sailing........but hey there's no place like home is there ?

15 comments:

ababoypart2 said...

Welcome back. Nice to know you had a great time in SA. Most people(I know) who have visited SA have a good tale of the place. I will like to be there one day. NEPA! Tell me all about it. My last visit to Nigeria was an eye opener. Its wasnt this bad with OBJ. OBJ please come back all is forgiven...lol

Ore said...

It is somewhat reassuring to hear that you had a wonderful time. After the outbreak of violence a few weeks ago, SA has not been on the top of my list of places to go to - and even before then, it wasn't.

Iyaeto said...

Welcome iyawo. I miss your 9ja gists o. I know the therapy would do her a lot of good.Keep the gist flowing this time and don't stop.

KemiMamaLopes said...

Ah. All is well with my blog world :) Glad you are back. I am sure the theraphy will work wonders.

Mandy Brown-Ojugbana said...

ababoy: this nepa thing is a bloody joke its a luxury these days to go online as you feel guilty about running the gen during the day ,and then at night we all flip coins for who gets it first.

ore:Well its a big world out there with lots of places to go and its good to travel.

Iyaeto:Thanks I will try .

Kemi:thanks for the props I will try to do my best to keep up the tori for everyone.

Mimi said...

Hi Mandy, so your back! There is always a place better than home, because in the end home is where the heart is. With us Nigerians we believe if we are not living in Nigeria then we are not at home.
Home is where we are at peace, feel safe and where we decide to build ours lives, we should never feel guility if that does not fit into the majorities view of home.

I interviewed a South African, a few months ago and he asked me if I had ever been to South Africa, I said because of the black and white issue I was rekuctant to go. He advised me that the best place to go was Cape Town. I guess from what you have seen he was right.

UndaCovaSista said...

My first insight into the world of Asberger's syndrome came in a very non-traditional way - by reading The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon.
I really hope your daughter's therapy was helpful.

I think it's very easy to be seduced by the beauty and 'vibe' of another city/country when only there temporarily, so i completely understand your desire to relocate. I just got back from a trip to Egypt and i was almost crying on the last day...it was that bad! I mean Egypt...seriously?!

I definitely left a piece of my heart behind, and will surely go back, but i have since come to realise, and admit to myself, that relocating to Egypt is really not a viable option for me at all!

Anonymous said...

hi Mandy, how is" my little baby" :) doing and rest of u there?
say hello to everyone, im glad u r happy....
paulina xxx

ibiluv said...

Glad to know SA thru ur eyes.......

hope the therapy did the little one some good.......

stay blessed.........

Anonymous said...

I think more than anything, we simply can't wait for the day our own 'home' will be like this esp. as we know we have all the potential. Sad, in some ways, hopeful in others.

Keep the fire burning. Don't compromise, lead by example. Slowly but surely.

? said...

i seriously do miss NEPA

Unknown said...

I know I know...Naija ALWAYS gets on your nerves whenever you're just returning from a trip...
Hang in there sis...

delabique said...

welcome back mandy

u were gone for so long

dont know what 'aspergers' is (will google it right now)but i do hope ur daughter is doing great

went to school with one of ur bros SIMON in Opebi

tc and do blog more often please..........

Anonymous said...

Glad to know you're okay and that you had a great time with your daughter in SA. Hope it went well. I've really missed your blogging. Welcome back again and pls update regularly.

Anonymous said...

I can' t but agree.I always wanted to send a letter in my situate something like that but I believe you' r faster.
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